Q: “I have 3 children, 1 son and 2 daughters. My husband and I have raised our children as nudists since our son was 5. He is now in his early teens and it is obvious that he is more mature than as a parent, I tend to accept. Recently he has said he didn’t want to participate in the nudist lifestyle anymore. At first when asked he would not say why only that he didn’t want to. I believe he is still interested because while in his room he is nude. Recently I walked into his room and he was nude, so I asked again why he didn’t want to participate with the rest of the family. He finally answered. He said he cannot control himself from getting an erection and it was embarrassing to him when he is naked in front of everyone. What do I say?”
A: First, this is very common among males in general. This is something he needs to understand. He is not the only one this happens to. Your son will learn to control the timing of his erection to an extent, but that won’t be for some time.
Second, he can try these tips to help make his erection diminish when it occurs. A cold shower often helps. If you are at a lake or river, going into the water may help because of the wet and cold water or just to get his mind focused on something else. The last will help him “grow” mentally as this is something most males don’t learn until later in life.
Third, cover up with a towel if the above don’t work or not available. At all resorts, a person is required to carry a towel at all times to sit on when using chairs, benches etcetera. He may want to carry an extra towel so he has one to sit on and one to cover up with if needed.
Forth, DO NOT make issue if he has to excuse himself to use a shower or jump into the lake. Make sure he knows that if he says he is heading to the water and will be right back, it is okay and that you will not question it.
Fifth, this is something that I don’t recommend as he will discover this soon enough if he hasn’t already. However, this maybe a good time to explain to him about masturbation if you haven’t already. Masturbation is not wrong, it is not bad, it is not immoral. It does not lessen one’s values. I don’t recommend using this as a method to make his erection go away because you don’t want to mix nudity with sex. This may be confusing to him unless you and your husband have gone to get lengths regarding the differences…. nudity does not mean sex…
Your son needs to know that what is happening to him is natural, is not cause to be embarrassed and means he is growing into a man.
I do encourage parents to read my blog and suggest this can be good reading material for your children.
Abby
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