Nudism is not Sexual?

This has been a major debate or more precisely a topic to educate non-nudists.  It is very basic.  Whether clothed or not, you will see people that immediately you think are pretty, handsome, sexy, hot and of course just the opposite ugly, plain, homely looking or may not attract your attention.  This will happen whether you are nude or wearing clothes.

For someone who always wearing clothing, they will see someone naked and say “they are sexy” or “they need to cover up”.  How would they feel about the same person if they were wearing clothes?  Clothed or naked, you will always at one time or another find someone that is extremely striking, enough so you take notice of this person.  And besides, sometimes wearing clothes (very little) is sexier than anything else.  Sometimes.

We (the nudist lifestyle livers) are not saying when you see someone naked it will not attract arousal or thoughts of how you feel seeing them.  We are saying being nudes does not mean sex.  How many times have you seen someone and thought “wow, he/she is extremely sexy”?  Was the person clothed?  We all have seen someone, somewhere and thought that person is pretty.  So pretty that person stands out.  Male or female, clothed or not, someone will come into your field of vision and you will say “wow”.

It truly is the same thing.

Abby

Nudism & Erections

Q: “I have 3 children, 1 son and 2 daughters.  My husband and I have raised our children as nudists since our son was 5.  He is now in his early teens and it is obvious that he is more mature than as a parent, I tend to accept.  Recently he has said he didn’t want to participate in the nudist lifestyle anymore.  At first when asked he would not say why only that he didn’t want to.  I believe he is still interested because while in his room he is nude.  Recently I walked into his room and he was nude, so I asked again why he didn’t want to participate with the rest of the family.  He finally answered.  He said he cannot control himself from getting an erection and it was embarrassing to him when he is naked in front of everyone.  What do I say?”

A: First, this is very common among males in general.  This is something he needs to understand.  He is not the only one this happens to.  Your son will learn to control the timing of his erection to an extent, but that won’t be for some time.

Second, he can try these tips to help make his erection diminish when it occurs.  A cold shower often helps.  If you are at a lake or river, going into the water may help because of the wet and cold water or just to get his mind focused on something else.  The last will help him “grow” mentally as this is something most males don’t learn until later in life.

Third, cover up with a towel if the above don’t work or not available.  At all resorts, a person is required to carry a towel at all times to sit on when using chairs, benches etcetera.  He may want to carry an extra towel so he has one to sit on and one to cover up with if needed.

Forth, DO NOT make issue if he has to excuse himself to use a shower or jump into the lake.  Make sure he knows that if he says he is heading to the water and will be right back, it is okay and that you will not question it.

Fifth, this is something that I don’t recommend as he will discover this soon enough if he hasn’t already.   However, this maybe a good time to explain to him about masturbation if you haven’t already.  Masturbation is not wrong, it is not bad, it is not immoral.  It does not lessen one’s values.  I don’t recommend using this as a method to make his erection go away because you don’t want to mix nudity with sex.  This may be confusing to him unless you and your husband have gone to get lengths regarding the differences…. nudity does not mean sex…

Your son needs to know that what is happening to him is natural, is not cause to be embarrassed and means he is growing into a man.

I do encourage parents to read my blog and suggest this can be good reading material for your children.

Abby

Genital Shaving

I've received several emails regarding gential shaving, so I will be covering all the questions with this post although I have only copied two of the questions (all of the others were basically the same questions asked of me).

Is genital shaving frowned upon at resorts/nude beaches?

I've noticed a lot of girls slightly older than me and older ladies that have shaved their genital/pubic area, is this ok? I really like the look and was thinking of doing it myself.

Most resorts do not have rules or regulations regarding genital shaving.  Genital shaving is normally considered the same as one's hairstyle; worn in a style that is liked by the individual person.  However, if you are one that shaves your pubic/genital hair, keep it neat just as you would have your hair styled and brushed appropreately for going out in public.

Genital/pubic shaving is okay.  Many men and women are doing and there does not seem to be any side effects medically speaking other than a few visual ones.  Shaving can produce a rash with tiny bumps similar to the rash some women getting shaving their under arms and like the rash some men get on their neck.  There are several precautions to take:
1. always use a new fresh razor that has not been used, I also dip mine in a cup of rubbing alchol to make sure it is sterial
2. wash the area to be shaved with warm soap and water
3. use a shaving cream designed for soft and sensitive skin (mine has aloe in it)
4. wash the area gently but thoroughly after shaving
5. apply a lotion in the shaved area
6. if you have to put clothes on afterwards, make sure the shaved area is dry
7. if you like the look and feel and plan on shaving, be sure to shave on a regular bases as to not allow stuble to get to long which will help prevent irritation.
8. apply lotion daily, this will keep the area soft and help from any rash developing

You may have to experiment a little as to which lotions and creams to use since each individual is different, the affects may differ slightly.

Aside from possible rash, in-grown hairs are possible; if you get an in-grown hair, take care of it properly.

There is no reason to be ashamed; a lot of women and girls shave the pubic area and the genital area.  Some do both and some do just the genital area.  There are also a lot of young ladies that have thought about shaving but are to embarrassed to shave.  I have shaved since I was thirteen or fourteen.

There are many different styles of shaving the pubic area.  A search on the internet should provide you with some input as to style.

Men also shave their pubic and genital areas.  I prefer a man with a neatly trim (short) pubic area and shaved shaft and testies.

Abby

Teenage Nudists, What Do I Do?

"I am a single mom of two.  My son and daughter are now in their mid to late teens.  Do I need to go to them and ask if they still want to be nudists (they have been since birth) or should I trust they will come to me if they don't?"

If your son and daughter have been nudists since birth, chances are they are comfortable with the situation and not concerned with being nudists.  Statistics show that being raised as a nudist makes a person more confident, comfortable with being naked in front of others, more accepting of people and their differences.

However it is not a bad idea to occasionally ask if the teenagers are still comfortable being nudists; this is true no matter how old or young the person.  I suggest asking each of the children separately if they have a problem going to the nude resorts or being a nudist at home, etc.  If either or both of the children say they do not want to continue the lifestyle, ask why.  Do not try to convince them they should continue but rather respect their feelings.  Discuss their answers and be sure to inform them that at any time they should come to you with any concerns or change of feelings.

Abby

Emails, Questions Regarding Nudism

I have received several emails covering a wide range of questions.  I will be posting the questions and answer here, but first here is a list of a few questions.

Is genital shaving frowned upon at resorts/nude beaches?

I've noticed a lot of girls slightly older than me and older ladies that have shaved their genital/pubic area, is this ok?

My family and I are practicing nudists at beaches and resorts and at home but from what I can tell none of my friends are.  How do I still do it when a friend comes over to visit or spend the night?  I don't want my family to change just because of my friends.

I am a single mom of two.  My son and daughter are now in their mid to late teens.  Do I need to go to them and ask if they still want to be nudists (they have been since birth) or should I trust they will come to me if they don't?

Our son is twelve and he is having some trouble controlling himself when we go to the local nude beach.  He gets an erection easily and then becomes embarrassed but does cover up like he is suppose to.  What should we do?  And what advice should we give him?

I will be answering these questions in the next couple of days.  Each question will have it's own post unless there are related questions.

Abby

Body Piercings and Nudity

Are genital piercing acceptable at a nudist resort?

Body piercings have always been a way to express one's self and to beautify the body.  A perfect and very common example is piercing of the ears.  Piercing of the ears have been done for generations here in America and it has been done and accepted in children and adults of all ages. Although some piercings are designed to enhance sexual sensations during sex with or without a partner, those same piercings also "beautify" the body.  Remember, beauty is in the eye of the beholder.

In my opinion all body piercing should be acceptable at a resort even though some resorts do not allow some genital piercings.  If you are planning a trip to a particular resort, call or email the resort and ask what the policy is regarding your exact type of piercing.  Don't beat around the bush, be honest and to the point as to the type piercing.

I have been lecturing and advising resorts for many years, trying to get resorts to accept piercings as a body expression NOT as a sexual attractant.  Although some people may consider genital piercing as a sexual expression these people must keep in mind that the piercings are also to make one appear more beautiful.

I have only a few piercings; ears pierced when I was about 5, my tongue pierced when I was fifteen and my belly button pierced when I was sixteen.  I still have all of my piercings and have no intention of removing them just to go to a nudist resort.  If the nudist resort I am interested in visiting does not allow body piercings, I don't go to that resort.

My brother on the other hand does have genital piercings and his piercings are not considered acceptable at some resorts.  Those resorts are ones we do not visit because he like me refuses to remove the piercings.

Be sure to check with the nudist resort before booking a stay or visiting the resort; don't wait until the last minute because the resorts rules may make you want to stay somewhere else.

Abby

In the Shower

After working out with my niece, we headed for the shower. The shower of course is much like ones at most high schools; a community shower that can probably hold up to 15 or 20 people at one time. A couple of ladies were discussing if it was appropriate for a friend to be showering with their daughter (age 10). Of course both ladies thought that was pushing the "limits" as far as a mother or father showering with a teenager.

My niece, Lisa (13), asked the ladies a blunt and very pointed question. "Why does age have anything to do with showering together?"
The two women of course stared at her blankly when one spoke asking if she would be comfortable showering with her mom or dad at the age she is now.  Lisa responded explaining, that she would feel more uncomfortable showering with strangers than with a parent. "Besides" Lisa pointed to me, "I'm showering with Aunt and two ladies I don't even know".

That ended the debate immediately and the two ladies agreed that it would be more uncomfortable with strangers, yet here we all are in the shower together. One of the ladies smiled and said "you are a very smart young lady".

Need more be said? What about showering with her dad?  Well, Lisa does. When we go to swimming pools at one of the resorts, we are all naked. So what?

And there are times when we have all walked in on each other either showering, getting dressed (if clothes are required for something), this is all a "big deal" because of the way people are brought up. For a nudist, there is often the question of... "What's the big deal? Is there a problem?"

An Apology For Being Nude

Although the title of this post maybe somewhat miss-leading, be sure and understand, at no time will there be an apology for be apart of a nudist life style. It is a personal choice that people make about how they want to live their life.

I receive emails time and time again (almost every day) from people either:
1. Saying how sinful being nude is, 2. Innuendos of having sex.
These people do not get it. Being nude is not against God; no where in the bible is there anything said about having to cover up, NO WHERE. Look it up, its not there. The discussion is about group sex or the like. It has been the thinking of the ministry that has added the train of thought that being nude is wrong or sinful. Again, being nude is NOT an invitation to have sex.

Innuendos of having sex. Being a Nudist does not mean a person is always out to have sex. Unrelated issues. It really is that simple. It is the mentality of people that has made nudity sex related. You can have sex without taking all of your cloths off. Just like you don't have to turn out the lights to have sex. But you do have to take your cloths off to be nude (obviously) and you don't have to have sex or even think about having sex just because you are naked.

You're naked when you shower; do you always have sex in the shower? No.
A majority of people sleep in the nude (ages from 5 to 100+); are they having sex every night? No.

Since a very young age most people are told to cover up or you can't run around naked, it's not acceptable. Yet in school during PE all the guys shower together after class as do all the girls, but this is considered acceptable. So if that is acceptable why is lying around a pool not acceptable? At a time in their lives when teenage hormones are running full force, we are pushing boys into showers -- being naked -- and the same with girls, can their immaturity really handle that after all these years of being told that being naked is okay only if you are in private?
What affects does this have on these teenagers mental growth?

Again, if it is okay to be naked around people you barely know as a teenager in a shower, why is it not acceptable to be naked at the beach or by a pool or in your backyard or at a resort?

Abby

Being Nude Is Not About Sex

When will people get it? Being naked is NOT about sex. Walking around, lying around or playing games while naked is not an invitation for sex. If you think being naked is about having sex, you're wrong and you don't get it. That is the mentality that has kept being nude so much a taboo.